The beginning of the beginning - Part 2

After my husband had convinced me that the destruction of our marriage was mostly my fault, I started to do some investigating. It all started one night when I went out with some friends, and got a disturbing Facebook notification.

Ahh, Facebook.....it's amazing that this new age social networking phenomenon can play such a large role in our lives.

Anyway, I got a notification that someone had posted something after a rather unfriendly comment I posted on the hubby's wall. This led me to discover

Truth #1: Alicia.

Once I found out some tidbits of information from the Aunts and friends who were also snooping around the internet, I started checking phone records, turns out, hubby and Alicia had been chatting for hours on end since mid-February, the day after Valentines Day to be exact.

When I confronted hubby about this fact, he continued to deny that he had committed any wrong doing and that he never cheated on me, and he left only because I was a horrible person to be around. What a joke! He explained that he did not intend to start a relationship with Alicia, nor did he plan to move in with her when he left me, and that they had known each other for their whole adult lives and that they had dated on and off for 13 years. Hold on.......13 years? Let's see, he and I were together for 4 years, and I started dating him one week after he broke up with his previous girlfriend (not Alicia) of 5 years.....that's about 9 years. Are you seeing where the numbers don't add up? But now they are in love (apparently this happened overnight several weeks after he moved out of my house according to their story.) That leads me to

Truth #2: he did not get an apartment, him and Alicia were living together, with her two young children (did I mention the two young children?).

Turns out, her husband was reported missing in late December, and was found dead the next day, I guess she decided that a month and a half of grieving was enough for her and four and a half months after burying her husband, she was living with mine and in love. Well, good for them.

So, here I am, single again, and caught up in this tangled mess. This experience has opened my eyes to so many things and has made me realize that life is short and I need to get off my ass and do something with it. There are a lot of changes I need to make in my life right now, and I'm looking forward to seeing where the story goes as I step into the next chapter.... and hoping that there are some folks in cyberspace that want to go along for the ride.....

Welcome to my blog! The beginning of the beginning - Part 1

So, I got married last year.........and now I'm getting divorced.

At the time, I thought I had found the "One". On our wedding day, I walked on a cloud as I married the apparent love of my life on the beautiful beaches of St. Thomas, USVI. As the year went on, things were going well. We had our fights, mostly about dishes and laundry, but nothing to call home about.

Then, about 3 months before our 1 year anniversary, I had to travel to Brazil for work. I would be gone 3 weeks, home for a week, then away for another 2 weeks. The whole time I was there, all I talked about was how much I missed my husband. When I finally got home for good, it seemed that things were different. And to top it off, I got staffed on a project in New York City, for which I would have to be away from home Monday through Thursday. Well, for a few weeks, I came home to find that hubby had not done a single chore....stinky week-old dishes in the sink, garbage strewn about, etc. He was hibernating in his "man cave" with his video game and was showing virtually no interest in spending time with me. We had some blowouts about combining our bank accounts and having kids. We were barely talking in the end.

In the middle of all this, was hubby's birthday. I had been planning it for weeks, if not months. He had been talking about getting a gun, going so far as getting his firearms license, and I was not exactly on board with the idea. But, I was willing to at least try out a gun and see how I felt about them. So, I had planned to take hubby and his friends to the shooting range. I was so excited because this was such a foolproof plan....he would absolutely love it! And it would be a great way to show him how much I cared about and listened to him. Well, we went....and I didn't get so much as a thank you. In fact, he posted something about it on Facebook and didn't even mention that his thoughtful wife was the one who brought him shooting.

The following week, we talked on the phone as usual while I got ready for bed in my hotel, and made plans for the weekend. I had planned on spending some quality time together and talking things out. I was ready to make things right again, divorce was not even a thought in my mind. Well, I came home, pet the dog, and saw hubby sitting in the kitchen, which was very strange. I walked in and this is what he said, "I have something to talk to you about, and you're not going to like it. I got an apartment, I moved my stuff out, and I want a divorce."

WHHHAAAAATTT??? I was absolutely in shock. He also said that he did not want to go to counseling. After staying a few short minutes longer, I told him to leave, as he really had nothing more to say and left me with nothing to hold on to.

What unfolds next makes it all come into focus....